Dear Charlotte

Dear Charlotte,

Hi sweet girl... it's Mommy.  I know I'm not usually the one to update this blog we keep for you, but I just felt like I had to tell you some things while they were still fresh in my mind. 

I know you know something is going on, because you have been much more active these past two days.  You might have heard Daddy and me crying off and on.  We're both very sad because your Nana left us for her new home in heaven yesterday morning.  She was the most amazing woman and was so excited to become your grandma.  Seeing you grow up was one of her biggest wishes.  You may never be able to understand how much she loved you already, but trust us when we say it was a lot. 

We found out we were expecting you the day after she was diagnosed with lymphoma.  You gave her so much to fight for these past six months and have already been a tremendous blessing to us all.  She got to see you slowly growing in my tummy, and you kicked her hand pretty hard about a month ago while she rested it on my belly.  She loved every new development you experienced.  Your Pop would read her our blog updates as she went through treatments to kill her cancer, and she really enjoyed the way Daddy's writing would make her laugh and cry.  She told me many times that she could not wait to see you and Daddy together.  She knew he would be the best dad.  She was the one that raised him to be so loving, caring, and forgiving. 

Daddy and I are sad for many reasons, but one of the biggest reasons is that you and she will never get the chance to meet here on earth.  It breaks our hearts that you will never get to hear her sweet laugh or see her wonderful smile.  She gave the best hugs, too.  She was also willing to listen to anyone's problems and gave great advice.  Despite Nana being unable to be here for you physically, we truly believe that you have just received the best guardian angel.  Please know that she will always be listening when you need someone to talk to...  The same thing goes for your future brothers/sisters and cousins.

Our stories about her will be poor substitutions for the real thing, but we will do our very best to tell you all about her one day.  We hope you have lots of questions and guide us in the right direction.  We may need help from time-to-time.  Right now, it seems impossible that I'm even writing these words to you, but I hope that time helps heal the hurt that this family feels today.

As I said in the beginning of this post, you have been moving around like crazy in my belly since yesterday morning.  I'm sure you sense my pain, but I can't help but wonder if it's because your Nana is tickling you from heaven.  I hope it's the latter...

Goodnight my sweet, sweet girl.

Love you forever,

Mommy